Apple is a big company that makes phones, computers, tablets and watches. They also have stores where they sell their things. They make a lot of money because people like their products and they work well with each other. Other companies also make similar things, but Apple tries to be different by making new features and working with other people to make better parts for their products. This makes them stand out from the others. Read from source...
1. The title is misleading and vague: A comparative study should clearly state which competitors are being compared with Apple, and in what aspects of the technology hardware, storage & peripherals industry. Instead, it only mentions "industry competitors" without specifying them or their criteria for comparison. This creates confusion and ambiguity for the reader, who may wonder why some competitors are included or excluded from the analysis. A better title would be something like: "Apple's Performance and Innovation in Technology Hardware, Storage & Peripherals Industry".
2. The introduction is too long and contains unnecessary information: The first paragraph of the introduction takes up almost half a page, but does not provide any relevant or useful background knowledge about Apple or its industry. It only repeats what was already stated in the title (Apple sells hardware, software, and services) and adds some generic statements about how Apple is a leader in innovation and customer satisfaction. This could be condensed into one sentence: "This article examines how Apple maintains its leadership position in technology hardware, storage & peripherals industry by offering innovative products and services that meet the needs of diverse consumers and businesses."
3. The body is poorly organized and lacks depth: The body of the article consists of two main sections: "Apple's Products and Applications" and "Apple's Partnerships and Distribution". Each section has several sub-sections, but they are not well connected or transitions. For example, after discussing how Apple designs its own software and semiconductors, the next sub-section jumps to how it works with Foxconn and TSMC to build its products and chips. This creates a disjointed and confusing narrative for the reader, who may wonder why these two topics are mentioned together and what is their relationship. A better structure would be to group related concepts together and show how they contribute to Apple's performance and innovation. For example: "Apple's Product Strategy" - How Apple develops its own software and semiconductors to create unique and integrated products that complement its flagship iPhone and extend its ecosystem of services and applications. "Apple's Manufacturing Partnerships" - How Apple collaborates with Foxconn and TSMC to outsource the production of its hardware, while maintaining control over quality, design, and innovation."
4. The analysis is superficial and lacks evidence: The article does not provide any quantitative or qualitative data to support its claims about Apple's performance and innovation. For example, it states that "Apple has progressively worked to add new applications, like streaming video, subscription bundles, and augmented reality", but does not mention how many users or revenue these applications generate, or how they compare